saturday night in boys town

 

had a dream in which i told a girl “pick a card any card”

and then started laughing uncontrollably

woke up confused, wondering what it meant

last night i went to two parties with Paul

drank two 40oz beers

ignored text messages from everyone

everyone hated me at the first party

because i drank quickly and silently and looked angry

everyone hated me at the second party

because i drank quickly and felt angry

and insisted on listening to pop music from 2011

i got kicked out of a restaurant for bringing a 40oz beer in with me

when they told me i couldn’t have it i muttered

“i’m going to go on a killing spree”

and then quickly and angrily finished the 40oz beer on the corner

i sat on the train at 5am and watched the sun slowly rise,

sad and soft over slumbering chicago,

mumbling “pick a card, any card” to no one in particular

i am stoned at a party on a saturday

 

and i’m convinced my friends don’t like me anymore

i’m sitting in silence in a chair on the other side of the living room

drinking a beer and thinking about basketball

i am listening to gabby drunkenly talk about her dog

i like her dog

her dog doesn’t remember me

his name is frankie and he has human eyes

do i have human eyes

i drank six beers and now my head is lolling back and forth

i like my friends

i want my friends to like me

i have the phrase “selfie nation” stuck in my head

i’m not sure what that means

i don’t have a driver’s license

when i lost my virginity the girl cried

she said i didn’t like it enough

is the moon lonely?

jack ferencz lives in chicago. he tweets at @jackferencz